Christmas without you

("Merry Christmas Paul, wherever you are" C.D.)

Another year has come and gone
Another festive season through
No snow, few smiles this year
It was Christmas without you

A weekend spent with family
But a weekend spent in pain
Remembering your countenance
Tears mixed with Christmas rain

It seems so damn ironic
And I can't deny the truth
Every Christmas I have spent
Has been a Christmas without you

I only got to know you this year
Once your sentence had been read
An ugly cancerous tumor
Had blossomed in your head

I prayed, I really believed
That it wouldn't be the end
God would be gracious
His total healing He would send

The last night I was with you
I didn't want to let you go
I needed more time
What I had was wasted so

Now it's one month later
And I'm supposed to be okay
My family doesn't know the sorrow
That still dwells within my frame

So I'd rather be alone
Wishing you were here
Waiting for an end
To this heartbreak of a year

I can't blame the ones that love me most
They didn't know you or your touch
They didn't know the man
I could have loved so much

The holidays are over now
And I'll be back to work this week
Back with our friends and co-workers
That miss you just like me

So here's to a better next year
And maybe something new
But a piece of me will never forget
Christmas without you